Just days after my daughter was born, family and friends began asking the inevitable: "So, when are you bringing her for a visit to New Mexico?" As my husband and I are both New Mexicans living in far-off New Jersey, I knew the day would come. But, air travel with a baby?! This, according to the All-Wise Counsel of My Friends Who Became Mothers Before I Did, was the ultimate test of parenthood, and with my husband working hard to support us, I knew I would be flying solo more often than not. Now, a year later, and with five round-trips under my belt, I am ready to impart my hard-earned knowledge with those of you about to undertake this heroic mission.
First, a disclaimer: I am not going to tell you what to pack, how many diapers to bring, or which suitcase to use. There are already plenty of very good articles online about this topic. Instead, think of this article as a step-by-step instruction manual on how to actually transport your baby from one destination to the other, all while keeping her dry, fed, and hopefully, happy. So, without delay (hahaha!), let’s get this plane off the tarmac!
CHECK-IN
Our day of travel begins in the unloading zone of the airport. We are there two hours before the flight, because extra time equals a calmer mama. My husband and I quickly unload all of the bags from the car. This usually includes a couple of bags to be checked and one (I stress the ONE!) carry-on bag, which should be your diaper bag filled with all the things you have decided are vital to your baby’s happiness, and a thing or two for yourself. I then strap on the Baby Bjorn (use whatever carrier you prefer) and we pop our little sweetie securely inside. So far when we have traveled, I have also brought along my daughter’s infant car seat and the snap-and-go stroller it fits into. However, for a slightly older baby, I recommend bringing along an umbrella stroller. I do not check these with the rest of the baggage. Instead, I bring them with me and check them at the gate. Doing so serves several purposes, most importantly providing you with a diaper-bag cart and another possible place to put your baby in the event that he has had enough of the carrier or if there is a serious flight delay. Next, my husband helps me lug (that’s why they call it luggage!) the remaining bags to curbside check-in. Curbside check-in, in my opinion, is essential to a smooth start. It’s worth the four or five dollars you set aside as a tip, believe me! Once the bags are checked, it’s a teary good-bye, and then (gulp!) we are truly on our own.
SECURITY
Proceed straight to security. Security is a monster all its own, and the faster you are through it, the faster you can breathe the first of several sighs of relief. This is where the baby carrier is most essential, as it allows you to retrieve your boarding pass and drivers’ license, remove your shoes, and place your diaper bag and stroller onto the conveyer belt with relative ease. I do not take off the Baby Bjorn or remove my daughter from it, and have so far been allowed to pass through the security checkpoint this way. Twice, they have done a quick pat down of the sides of the carrier and of my stomach area directly behind the carrier. If this makes you uncomfortable, you could also remove your baby from the carrier after you have placed all your belongings on the conveyer belt, place the carrier on the belt, and carry your baby through the detector in your arms. Take your time on the other side of security. Grab your carry-on, find a spot to sit, breathe, put your license back in its place, and slip your shoes back on (did I mention slip-on shoes are a must?!). Remember, this is why you arrived at the airport early!
A final note on security: if you are traveling with formula or expressed breast milk, they will ask you if they can do a quick scan on the contents of the bottle. Do not be alarmed. Simply unscrew the top of the container, and they will wave some sort of litmus paper over the top of it to make sure the acidity of the substance does indeed match the acidity of formula or breast milk. When my daughter was on formula, I brought the powder and several clean but empty bottles in the diaper bag, then bought bottled water on the other side of security to bypass this situation all together.
YOUR GATE
Once you make it through security, life gets easier. Immediately find your gate. Tell the agents there that you are checking a stroller at the gate, and they will give you a tag for it and also tell you where to leave your stroller once you board the plane. Each airport is slightly different, though, so you might need to go with the flow on your airport’s process for strollers. Keep in mind: if you have a layover, you will need to get a new stroller tag at your new gate for the second leg of the trip. Next up, coffee! (Iced, so I don’t spill hot coffee on my daughter, of course.) If you are a frequent user of the bathroom—which most of us are once we’ve given birth!—this is also a good time to hit the stalls one last time. If the restroom’s changing table looks less than spic-n-span, try winging it on the waiting area floor with a changing pad in a discreet corner. My daughter actually prefers it this way. I keep a few toys handy at the top of my diaper bag, and entertain her while we wait for boarding to begin. Try not to feed your baby at this point if you can help it (but feed him if he needs it!), because ideally you want him to be hungry for that milk at take-off!
BOARDING
“Now boarding all first class and platinum choice members!” When I hear this call, I am up and ready to board. Some airports (for example, Newark) will then say something about all families with young children or those needing assistance. That’s you—GO! Other airports (for example, Chicago) expect you to wait until that ridiculous group number on your ticket. Here’s my opinion on this: Just get in line after the first class people, look sweet, and hand the attendant your boarding pass. So far, it’s worked for me every time. Once you’ve found your seat, place the diaper bag underneath and sit down. Breathe for at least a minute. Your baby will be totally captivated by the bustle around him, so use the time to acclimate yourself. Get a read on the people around you. Who looks like they will help you hold your orange juice when your baby begins smacking your tray table uncontrollably? Who looks like they could be up for some serious mid-flight peek-a-boo? When I’m ready, I remove my daughter from the carrier, which I store under the seat, and buckle my seatbelt. Then comes the most crucial step: Gather all necessities that can possibly fit in the seatback pocket. For me, this includes a container of snacks (Earth’s Best Elmo Crackers are our #1), milk and/or water, a bib, a couple of books, a diaper and wipes, my latest New Yorker magazine (wishful thinking) and, finally, anything else that will fit.
IN-FLIGHT ENTERTAINMENT
It’s now up to you to entertain this little person as best you can for the duration of the flight. I can’t tell you exactly what to do since every baby is so different, but I have figured out a few winning strategies:
· Feed your baby throughout the flight. Milk at takeoff and landing is key if you can pull off the logistics of it, but don’t forget to follow the natural demands of your child. If she wants milk the minute you sit down in your seat, give it to her.
· Make sure that every 20 to 30 minutes, you offer another small snack (crackers, some banana, a bit of cheese, whatever your baby likes).
· Peek-a-boo is another winner, and is even better if a teenage girl or grandma is sitting near enough to get in on the fun. Use the bib.
· As far as books and toys go, pull these out one at a time and use them to their maximum potential. Avoid playthings that make a ton of noise, but if your baby wants to bang on the tray table with the eyes of her Elmo doll, let her do it for a minute then distract her with something else. It might bug those around you for that minute, but a screaming mad baby will bug them for much longer.
· Walk laps.
· When all else fails, turn to what thousands of bored adults turn to: SkyMall! My daughter and I have spent countless minutes browsing this catalog, finding all the doggies, all the babies, all the mommies, etc. And, it doesn’t matter if she rips out a few pages!
· If your patient prince has decided his only desired activities are screaming and crying, and you’ve tried every trick in your seatback pocket, know you are not alone. Know that this has happened to all of us at least once, and that it feels much worse to you than it seems to everyone else.
· And finally, remain compassionate to your child, remember the fun you will have once you’ve landed, and breathe.
CONGRATULATIONS!
You did it. You landed. The euphoria is running through your veins like you’ve just run a marathon. And in fact, you kind of did. Pat yourself on the back, pat your sweet baby on the head, and walk off the plane a champion. You’ve earned your wings today, mama.
